GW’s Beauty Babe: Sizzles & Fizzles for 2013

By Arden Edelcup –The Beauty Babe

“Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.”  

                                                                       — Dorothy Parker

One of my favorite mindless hobbies is the very un-scientific study of what is sashaying past me NOT on the runways of Milan but along the Streets of Suburbia. As a self-proclaimed student of every beauty and fashion trend, I have compiled my very first list of Sizzles & Fizzles for 2013 …

Lululemon-Inspired Thumb-holes

Let’s start with the obvious. Within the last few years, the cult of Lulu has everyone from yogafied moms to fresh-faced teeny boppers proudly displaying the Lulu logo on their lycra headbands and floppy winter caps. While we all have tightened our post-2008 recession belts, we justify our $100-plus Lululemon yoga pants with the unified battle cry that our butts look sooooooo good in them. Without spending a single dollar on advertising, Lululemon has given birth to the much copied “thumb holes” as the hottest fashion style. Who needs gloves when your fingers are toasty warm inside the arm of your sweatshirt with only a little thumb poking through?

Confession alert: I don’t really understand the trend but I think it is adorable anyway. I drank the Lululemon kool-aid and there is no going back.

Salon Blow-Outs

While a wash and set at the neighborhood salon used to be the weekly ritual of our laquered-haired bubbes, it is now a super-hot trend that saw its rebirth last year in New York with the success of a string of Blow-out Bars.  It is the “why didn’t think of that idea” of the year.  Now salons in my suburban ‘hood are offering up great $20-$40 blowouts that last for days.

While it may seem irrational, we ALL feel so much sexier when our hair looks that good.

Short Colorful Nails

It has been a blast selling nail polishes this year.  I am so happy to say goodbye to mindlessly selling the perennially boring Ballet Slippers and Blanc (for French manicures on mostly thick, long acrylic nails.) I joyfully embrace the new, hot trend of fun, funky colors for fingers and toes.

I love giving my ‘yenta opinion’ on whether red shattered nail polish or magenta magnetic polish will match a customer’s sexy dress.

I watch with fascination at the endless debates friends have over their polish choices. It’s just good old-fashioned fashionista fun.  Even celebrities are cashing in on the trend. OPI just launched the sizzling Mariah Carey Collection (not to be outdone by, of course, the Kardashian’s Nicole polish collection.) Chuckle of the day: Justin Beiber is getting into the polish game too with his own OPI collection in spring. And of course, the best-selling colors for 2012 for my fabulous fashionistas were “50 shades of Nail Polish Grey”. We couldn’t keep enough grey-colored hues in stock from Essie’s Smokin’ Hot & Merino Cool to OPI You Don’t Know Jacque.

Breakthrough of the Year – Human Growth Factors

Yes, you heard it here first.  Skinmedica and Neocutis both are being tauted by the top dermatologists and plastic surgeons all over suburbia for their miracle “human growth factor” ingredient. Multiple medical studies have shown that this ingredient (which is derived from fetal foreskin) does what prescription retinoids do (like Retin-A) just without the irritation.

Once you get over the ‘Little Penis Issue’ — slather that stuff on and watch your wrinkles melt away. What is a little ‘Ick Factor’ for one less age spot?

Arm Candy

Goodbye Tiffany toggle bracelets and diamond tennis bracelets, a Warm Hello to authentic chunky layered bead bracelets. The great thing about this trend is that the price points run the spectrum of really inexpensive to more pricey gemstone beads.  Beads come in every color and hue, and many mix in chubby buddhas and skulls. They look great in a mix of colors and size beads.

The best part of this trend is that it has awaken the Inner Jewelry Designer in so many women …  Nothing says cool more than a ‘frugal fashionista’ who makes her own Buddha bracelets.

Big Bountiful Eyelashes

It was only a few short years ago, that false eyelashes were for Las Vegas Showgirls and Tammy Faye Bakers — well, not anymore.  This past year has been called the Explosion of Lashes. Lashes are all the rage, with everything from Latisse to Lilash growth serums, long-lasting lash extensions, eyelash tints, to old fashioned cheap false eyelashes. Women of all ages are simply obsessed with their lashes.

Mascara is now merely just one tool in the ever growing Arsenal of Eyelash Products a girl MUST possess to keep her windows to the soul looking super-seductive.

“Liquid Face-Lifts”

Juvederm, Restalyne, Sculptra. I will give up my daily Starbucks, watch my boobs swing to the floor, but I can not give up these beloved little injectibles.  As we age, the collagen of your youth begins to break down, which leads to the hollowness of the middle-aged face. These revolutionary fillers last 6-9 months and cost approximately $750 – $1500 depending on how many injections you need. When done over a period of time, they begin to help stimulate collagen in your face so you can actually go longer periods of time in between injections. The big payoff is that our generation of women can say a gleeful good-bye to the nasty facelift operations that our mothers had to suffer through.

Beauty Balms Are Da Bomb

They arrived overseas from Asia to a cult-like following in 2012, and now every skincare company is jumping into the Beauty Balm game.

BB creams combine the powers of at least five products currently in your makeup bag. They magically moisturize, prime, tone, control oil and add a protective layer of SPF.

Their sublime ability to make fine lines nearly disappear also means BB creams can double as your foundation.  While tinted moisturizers were the cool girls before, this product is your new BFF.  Drugstores carry  Garnier, Loreal & Maybelline BB creams ($15 -$2o).  However, the balm that lovingly sneaks in the highest dose of anti-aging peptides & anti-oxidants while it transforms your skin is Sarah McNamara’s Miracle Skin Transformer ($48).  This cream is the friend who understands all your needs and always makes you feel great about yourself.

So bring it on 2013 — We Are SO Ready. We girls can take everything you have in store for us, and we’ll do it with a twinkle of good humor and of course, while wearing our butt-lovin’ pair of Lulu leggings.

Lisa Barr, Editor of GIRLilla Warfare: Arden Edelcup is a Mom of three “Indiana Hoosiers” and owner, with her hubby Earl Edelcup, of Ross’s in Highland Park, Illinois. 

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